no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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