am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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