Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
