Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
