That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
