let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
