Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
