She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
