DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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