im drinking this country out of the recession.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
the raccoons are back...
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