hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize
