Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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