there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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