And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize