Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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