i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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