I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Randomize
