I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
