At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
