Soap is not a condiment
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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