Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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