I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize