remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
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