I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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