Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
