it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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