i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I AM VODKA MAN
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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