I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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