Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
