Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Randomize
