Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
