Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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