Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
