Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
