Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize