I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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