Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
