On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
