im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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