Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
