I look better un-naked...
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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