1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I want her autograph on my taint
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
