i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
