Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
