Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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