if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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