I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
