He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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