I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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