Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
If that was your dad, he is hot
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
